( Private / not actually written / etc )

New Year's is a funny holiday to celebrate, here, since I think really the only reason there's a year or a month even is through consensus. Because everyone says there's no one in the City except people who were brought here, and without people there wouldn't be any time. Or at least, no measuring time. But time does pass, the seasons change, so I guess the year does too.

I suppose I should be thinking about what plays we should do next. I don't really want to make resolutions, I don't think I've changed my philosophy any so I'd resolve to do the same thing I always mean to do.

I hope the New Year has more good days than bad ones, I think that's all I can really say.

[VOICE;]

[After a long pause, sounding rather tired...]

...We'll have to recast Lady Bracknell.


[click.]




[ooc; sad neil is sad ;_;]

[VOICE;]

[No preamble, just a deep breath, and then...]

( Cut for Length, Language, and Gratuitous Borrowing of Poetry || not-IC cut )

[There's another moment's pause, as though he's going to say something else, before Neil thinks the better of it and cuts off the recording with a click.]

[Audio]

I didn't mean to go through. I was only trying to see if I could find Anne, and while I was looking in it's like it moved to swallow me up and.

[There's a pause here as Neil tries to collect himself. He's managing not to sniffle, but not even trying to hide how distraught he is.]

I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I didn't know I'd fall through.

I want to come back. Please. I don't want to be here.

There's something wrong-- I'd think it was a curse except Todd was fine before he went out to find Rosella, and... now... She was like this too-- confused and quiet and just not right. I dunno if he caught it from her, or what-- both of them just say that the Deities did it, but they won't say what they did.

He won't talk, not unless I ask him a question and even then he says so little... he's always quiet but not like this, this isn't right... And he just... sits there. Didn't even go to bed until I suggested the idea.

Please... I don't know what's wrong, I don't know what to do...



[ooc; Todd went out to find Rosella and ended up getting his heart stolen. Neil? not happy. crai]

That curse, did it really mean--

Does that mean I'm oh god I can't even say that I can't think that maybe--

I hope no one puts that idea into his head, I don't want him to think-- to be angry at me and.

oh god.


Things here are never quite what I expect them to be. Which I usually like, but those things yesterday were creepy. I managed to keep away from them, mostly, and shooed a couple of them out when they slipped through the open door, so I didn't lose any teeth. Still, I'm kind of bothered by the thought of those things crawling under pillows... I mean, it's just your parents who do that when you're little, really, but I can't help imagining it.

I haven't really written anything here since that one ridiculous curse. I think I've apologized to everyone I spoke to, but, just in case, all of that was nonsense and I wasn't raised by spiders. Obviously. And to the best of my knowledge Todd has never been an astronaut.



[ooc; 'And pour the waters of--'... Strikes are not written he is just panicking. <3]

( Private; hackable )

( Filtered to the Deities )

If I made a fool of myself the other day, I'm sorry about it. I really didn't know I was cursed.


[ooc; on top of the Road Not Taken curse, he found this ;_; aaaangsssst. tags may be spotty for a while, costumewerk /m/,]

[Accidental Voice Post]

N-no, it's not fair... You can't be here, too. you can't. How did you--

[A chair clatters to the floor as Neil backs up into it; he grunts a little as he trips over it, keeps going. Obviously whoever he's talking to, he doesn't want to be anywhere near them. He pauses for a moment; but no other voice is audible.]

I'm not going to-- don't come any closer-- I won't drop out. I don't want to, and they need me, and you haven't done anything for me and how could you even say that, after what happened? This is all I've ever wanted to do, why won't you understand...

[His voice drops nearly to a whisper, but he sounds much bolder, much more sure of himself.]

You can't make me give it up. I won't. My friends here won't let you-- you can't make me do anything!

I won't!!


[ooc; guess who was in Neil's living room this morning. ;____; as long as he gets the gist of this being a curse he'll be fine to perform later. if a little freaked out. SO PERFECT BRB WEEPING WITH JOY]

riverrun, she said. I don't know what it means, but I don't want to forget it. Maybe I ought to worry more about why, about what it means to be here-- what the cost might be-- but it's hard to care, knowing where I might be otherwise. What I might be... It's bad enough, being reminded by the stillness... but... I'll take that, over being a ghost.

Is being remembered really what makes the difference? I guess it's nice to know, in a sense... though in other ways it only makes things worse. No matter what anyone says I know I don't deserve to be here. But I am. So maybe I should just... try to forget, about what I deserve or don't, and try to make the most of this. A second chance, to get it right. Seize the day. I'm trying, really.

I wonder what they would ask of me, to buy my life back... and whether it would be wrong of me to do it.

I've been meaning to make this announcement a while, but between the curses and everything else... well, better late than never.

We're still looking for people for our production of A Midsummer Night's Dream in June, and need to fill the following roles;

THESEUS, Duke of Athens
EGEUS, Father to Hermia
PHILOSTRATE, Master of the Revels to Theseus
SNUG, a Joiner
FLUTE, a Bellows-mender
SNOUT, a Tinker
STARVELING, a Tailor
TITANIA, Queen of the Fairies

As well as, if we can get them, a few more fairies. Both with and without lines, though the fairies who do have speaking parts don't have much to memorize. Please let me know, as soon as you can, if you're interested! Even if you're not entirely certain. I'll talk you into it.

For everyone already in the play, what times would be good for you for rehearsals?

Other than that... I think I promised a few people I'd fence with them, but I lost track of who... Caspian, and Kate, and... was there anyone else?

I should update more often, or things pile up...

Also, do you think I could buy a typewriter, somewhere in the City..?



[ooc; strikes are unwritten, I just wanted to voice what's on his mind ;_; Play post here forever. also, striking out as people are wheedled into it, ahaha. <3]

[Voice | Accidental]

[There's a quiet sound of pages rustling... And if you listen closely, a soft voice. Neil is reading poetry to himself, because there's nothing else he can do, today... No one sees him, no one seems to hear him. He's got no idea that he's recording.]

Their spirits beat upon mine
Like the wings of a thousand butterflies.
I closed my eyes and felt their spirits vibrating.
I closed my eyes, yet I knew when their lashes
Fringed their cheeks from downcast eyes,
And when they turned their heads;
And when their garments clung to them,
Or fell from them, in exquisite draperies.
Their spirits watched my ecstasy
With wide looks at starry unconcern.
Their spirits looked upon my torture;
They drank it as it were the water of life;
With reddened cheeks, brightened eyes
The rising flame of my soul made their spirits gilt,
Like the wings of a butterfly drifting suddenly into sunlight.
And they cried to me for life, life, life.
But in taking life for myself,
In seizing and crushing their souls,
As a child crushes grapes and drinks
From its palms the purple juice,
I came to this wingless void,
Where neither red, nor gold, nor wine,
Nor the rhythm of life is known.

[There's a low little sigh.]

Minerva Jones...

[The post trails off into silence.]

[ooc; AFFECTED! Neil is invisible and relatively insubstantial; the best he's managed to do is pick up one book to read, Edgar Lee Master's Spoon River Anthology. 'Cause being mean to dead kids is fun. The amount of effect he has on the tangible world waxes and wanes a little, so some responses may be incomplete or accidental, to add to confusion ♥]

I... have a heartbeat, again.

I hadn't realized... I've only been breathing out of habit, I think. It's... different.

This is just for today, isn't it? A curse? Though... it's... nice. But maybe it will only make things worse tomorrow, when everyone goes back to normal.