♕ |[40]|

[had_not_lived]

It's a beautiful day, City. Make the most of it.

I need your advice. I'm looking for something to read, something that isn't poetry. Knowing I can't just makes me want to read more! Anything, really. Novels or essays or, I don't even know, so long as you like it.

Call it a change in perspective.

There are a hundred thousand lines that'd suit today and I can't remember one. Still. It's a small price to pay.

Comments

[primrosella.livejournal.com]

She gives his arm a light squeeze in return, in recognition and appreciation of the comfort he's extending. "I am. I'll just have to keep a closer eye on myself, that's all."

But the point of the walk is hardly to dwell on matters like that, and the last thing she wants is to bring down Neil's good mood by giving him cause to worry about her, so she'll try to bring things back to a lighter note. "Why, I even cleaned my room for once, can you imagine? It's really quite remarkable, being able to see the floor again."

[had_not_lived]

He laughs a bit at that. "But you didn't throw anything out, did you?" Rosella's packrat habits are a bit incomprehensible to him, but endearing; Neil doesn't aspire to own much more than books, and even those he's less prone to buying now that he has the store to peruse on a daily basis. Except, you know, for the books he ends up not wanting to sell to anyone else because he likes them too much. The books he's had to buy yet another bookshelf for.

On second thought, maybe he understands after all.

[primrosella.livejournal.com]

"Goodness, no!" Rosella answers, a little too quickly. It's one thing to reorganize her whole room and find places for everything, but to get rid of it all entirely is quite another. Old habits die hard, after all, and she's still not convinced that she won't someday need a nail or spring or old bit of leather on short notice. But at least this way, it meets the traditional definition of organized, rather than simply her own variety of knowing where everything is despite the mess. "Er...no, it's all mostly just reorganized. So it's easier to walk around and find things, that's all."

[had_not_lived]

"Well, still, it's good. Makes it easier to find things." Grinning, he takes a sip of his tea, trying to decide how bes to change the topic. Whether it's the best idea to do it in the first place.

Well, why not.

"So... about the book thing."

[primrosella.livejournal.com]

"Oh, yes. The book thing. Well, with my room all sorted out, there won't be any trouble at all if you'd like to have a look at my shelves," she replies, offering him a faint smile. "They're mostly collections of fairy tales, I'm afraid, but I have a few other good ones, too."

[had_not_lived]

"Well, thank you. Though I meant..." He takes a breath, looks away a moment-- a wide roll of his eyes screwing up his courage to explain things. Not that there's anything to be embarrassed about, but still, there's something private to these matters by nature.

"I thought I'd explain maybe." Because she deserves to know. "I can't read poetry right now. Not all. Whether or not I want to."

[primrosella.livejournal.com]

She blinks, looking a little surprised, and her pace slows accordingly as she glances over at him with curiosity in her gaze. "You can't read poetry?" she repeats, frowning a little. "But what could be keeping you from--"

But then she falls silent as it all starts to click into place; whether he wants to or not implies that he's been cut off from it somehow, and given Neil's deep love for poetry...

"...You traded with the deities for something?" she guesses softly.

[had_not_lived]

"For a couple'f weeks. It doesn't sound like much but knowing I can't makes me want to more than I would have normally," he says softly, with a little laugh, managing to meet her eyes with some difficulty. He knows this sort of thing worries her.

"It's all right. Really. It was-- a small thing, to break the deal Todd made months ago."

[primrosella.livejournal.com]

And she is worried, but more at the suddenness of it all. Why should Neil so abruptly decide to break the deal that allowed him to share Todd's life, to have the experience of being alive again for half the time again? And after the sacrifice Todd had made, giving up his voice for a whole month--no, she doesn't believe it's a small thing at all, because undoing that deal after everything they went through for it is hardly a small thing at all. It must be something else, and she knows it.

She also knows, however, that Neil is clearly trying to protect her feelings; she's had enough to be upset over already this week, and of course there is great potential that news like this would only add to that bad mood. So she does understand that much, and she is grateful for his tact in the matter.

Still, she can't help but inquire further as her curiosity gets the better of her. "Todd's deal of sharing his life with you? Why...but why would you undo something like that? Is Todd all right? Did...something happen?"

[had_not_lived]

"Todd's all right! He's fine. We're both fine," he hurries to reassure her, glancing wide-eyed in her direction. It's complicated but the deal seemed the best place to start, the story easier to unfold in reverse order.

"I broke the deal because someone offered me my life. All the time, without any cost, without Todd or anyone else having to suffer for it. And so..." He shrugs lightly, a small, warm smile working its way back onto his face.

[primrosella.livejournal.com]

"Todd's...you're..." she whispers, hardly even realizing she's come to a stop, letting her arm fall from Neil's as she stares at him with wide eyes.

All the time--no cost--Neil, alive again, Neil and Todd, both alive at once, and it's nothing short of a miracle--

And before she quite realizes it, she's leaping at him, her drink long forgotten as she moves to throw her arms around his neck and hug him as tightly as she can.

[had_not_lived]

Neil laughs, a welcome echo of the masterless joy he felt when Yvaine handed him his life, reeling a bit, tea splashing as the cup tilts and he throws his free arm around her shoulders. Life is good. Pun at least halfway intended.

"I told you, it was a small price to pay!"

[primrosella.livejournal.com]

"I should say so!" Rosella exclaims, though it is slightly muffled due to the fact that her face is currently situated against her arm and his shoulder. Her shoulders are shaking with laughter, and suddenly the warmth she'd noted earlier takes on a whole new meaning, a new level of notice. Neil is warm because Neil is alive, and Todd is, too, and they're both--they're both fine. They're really both fine.

And if she ends up crying against his shoulder a little, too, as her shoulders continue to shake...well, that might be as much due to overwhelming happiness as anything else.

[had_not_lived]

Grinning like a fool, he doesn't mind holding onto her as long as she needs to lean on him. It's nice to be the bearer of good news, for once.

"It's... honestly, a little unbelievable, even to me. In a good way. The best way."

[primrosella.livejournal.com]

Eventually, she slowly releases him, wiping her eyes with her sleeve and managing a wobbly smile as she tries to pretend like she wasn't just crying at all that. Later, she'll have time to wonder at the good fortune of it all, and silently remark on the uncanny coincidence of the timing--that she should receive such terrible news and such wonderful news so close to each other, and both things that she never would've dreamed of seeing happen.

"Well, thank goodness for these cups with lids," she remarks with a slight laugh, reaching in her pocket for a handkerchief to help dab off some of the liquid that may have splashed out. "And thank goodness for good news--oh, Neil, it's--it's simply wonderful."

[had_not_lived]

Neil tilts the cup, tipping a few beads of pooled liquid off the lid, still grinning widely. That's not likely to change for the next few days, really; and joy is something that increases in sharing.

"I know! It's... it's.... well, the kind of thing I'd write poems about," he replies with a laugh. "If I could."

[primrosella.livejournal.com]

"You ought to make Todd write one for you," Rosella suggests with a laugh of her own. "As something to look forward to, for when you finally get the ability to read it back. It'd be a bit like waiting for Christmas, wouldn't it?"

[had_not_lived]

"Maybe," he muses, chewing at the straw and sipping his drink for a moment. "I should remind him, he can write as much as he wants now without worrying about me reading it before it's done!"